thebootydiaries:

concept: u and i go to the aquarium for our first date. u are nervous as u try to hold my hand. but u accidentally knock the cracker out of my hand because ur a piece of shit and u don’t use ur eyes. there goes my damn cracker. look what u have done. i run away screaming and never return ur phone calls. it’s been three years and u still write to me occasionally but i never answer. where is my cracker

(via coziestprincess)